Lyuda comes to America - Caveat Emptor

Shopping. That is the word I would use to summarize my nanny's visit to the U.S. You name it, she bought it. Even if it already exists in Ukraine for a decent price and at decent quality. Socks? 25 pairs. Sweaters? 15. Dora dolls? 1. And a big thanks to my darling sister for taking her out - the language of shopping apparently trumps any need for a common spoken language.



We went to Quogue for the weekend. She shopped in West Hampton (pricey!) and bought lots of good tchotchke. More importantly, she saw an ocean for the first time in her life. I was glad we could do that for her - it was a beautiful freezing cold misty strong-ocean kind of day - and you really got a sense of power and majesty. I hope she enjoyed it, I know I liked seeing the ocean through the eyes of someone who never has before. And S and G liked playing ball on the deck, since it was too windy and cold for them to stand much of the beach itself.

But as I kept saying to myself, imagine you lived under a Communist system and were given 2 weeks to shop for anything and everything you could ever want. Wouldn't you go a little crazy too?

Valentine's Day

Thank you to my wonderful husband for sending me beautiful and unexpected roses for Valentine's Day (and astrolomeria for my birthday, but no photo here.) He's the best hudband EVER! And I say that even after 5 years of marriage and 3 kids, long distance separation, stressful jobs, tight finance and all of the difficulties that come along with life.

What fun we have had, though, vacations and cuddles and 3 kids... Love you, DLN.

The Rogers Five - Pt 2

What? My cousins are coming? I'm so excited...

We actually got 5 of the 6 grandkids in a photo. I won't say it's a frameable photo, as you can imagine that it wasn't the most receptive audience for posing. You can see above the best I got, and then below the rapid deterioration of cooperation!

The Rogers Five - Pt 1.

As you can imagine, 2 grandparents, 3 kids, 2 spouses, 1 nanny and 5 kids under five proved for an exhilirating, diaper-tear-laughter-bruise-chaos-exasperation-fun filled weekend. I like this photo (of the early birthday party) since you can see all of the kids doing their own thing, and you can see the Transformer cake as well. Poor Lyuda, a bit overwhelmed by our big American family, I think...Cole is such a monkey (and my godson, so he gets a special photo here...)

The babies sussed each other out (one of these kids is bigger than the other!) and you would think Miss G would be intimidated, but Cora is so absolutely darling and even-keeled in her temperament, that there was no conflict. Does she even cry? Miss S liked to play hostess.

The only down side? The cold that passed on to both of my kids, but even that had a silver lining, since the Lufthansa airline strike forced us to push our tickets back a week, so we didn't have to fly with a 2 year old with a high fever and a coughing baby!

Visits with extended family

Cousin Mary Marr and her son Stewart came for literallly and in and out visit to see the kids. They were on their way back to Baltimore. Mary is famous for telling my mother that I have a cousin (Cameron) in Kyiv and putting us together. Cameron had a healthy baby boy on February 3, so what a strange set of coincidences it's all turned out to be!

I'm too tired to be creative

Rather a random smattering of photos from the U.S. and back here. The little G is getting so big already! Here she is on the sheepskin from New Zealand that A bought for our first little girl. Look how tall she is - she's under the chart for weight-to-length, in essence very long and lean. Not for lack of eating, though, she's a little hoover!

And here she is with her Aunty Voo, who attended to us during my period of confinement :-) I'm sure it was an eye-opener into the treasures and travails of early childrearing. How will it affect Aunty Voo's decision to have kids...? Let's not rush it folks!

Amazing Grace!

A big "what? you're here?" welcome to the newest member of the family, Miss Grace Eileen Mayhew. Born December 14, 2009 at 7:52 AM. Weighing in an 7 lb, 1 oz, a respectable 21 inches, and a set of lungs and an appetite like to other!

The abbreviated labor story (minus the "yucky bits") is as follows. I had sent the family off to the airport Sunday morning, to catch an 11:30 AM flight to NZ via LAX and Auckland. Mom and I spent the day sorting through clothes for the Purple Heart organization, which was to do a pick up Tuesday morning. (See the nesting instinct at work?) So we cleaned all day, and then Mom and Voo went off to a Holiday Open House. I wanted to nap, but I just felt funny, and restless, and I couldn't sleep. Around 5 I had an indication that something may be happening, but small enough that I thought I could wait for Monday morning's 10 AM appointment with the midwife.

But then, around 11:30 PM, there was a bit of water. I called the midwife, and she told me that I'd know if my water had broken (it never did with S) since I'd be all wet. I wasn't, so I went to sleep. At 2:30 AM I woke up with a contraction. This set off a huge chain of thinking that all made sense in the middle of the night - I'm having the baby, no I'm not, can I wait until my 10 AM appointment?, what are the chances this is just a one-off.... Then another big contraction at 3 AM. And then we were off. I called the midwife, Kathy, at the Birth Center again at around 5 AM. Said the contractions were 4-8 minutes apart. She said to call back when they were more regular and closer. For those who have heard the story of S's labor, you'll know that my body has a tendency to accelerate rapidly through labor, so I hastily packed my bag for the birth - clothes for a baby, for me, chapstick, etc.

When Mom and Dad got up around 6, I was downstairs frantically emailing my mother-in-law, since I didn't have her number, and didn't know how to get in touch with A. When I started puffing (we were getting close) Dad headed quickly for the train station. Mom thought she had some time (HA!) and checked her work email. I was in the background saying - Log off! Or there'll be a baby in the kitchen!

We got in the car, and drove the 5 minutes to the Birth Center, arriving about 7:10 AM. I hadn't called back, so Kathy didn't expect us. The cleaning lady let us in. This facility has only 4 birthing suites, and is designed to be as close to a home birth as possible. They only let you stay 4-12 hours after the birth, and then you're home.

So, Kathy makes me go upstairs for an exam. Deja vu! I just want to have the baby, and whoever it is needs to "check" - just trust me - I know what baby feels like! So I was 6 cm and ready to go. Went downstairs, and went right into second stage. Pushed for about 7 minutes, and there you go. Mom was a great help - it is a totally different dynamic to have your mom in the room helping out - less swearing for one, but really quite comforting. Of course, I wish my husband had been there, but in the scheme of things, I've got him for the next few decades, and that's more important. Grace came out and nursed immediately - within 30 seconds. A dedicated little one! She was coated with vernix, and they used waffle-pattern towels to clean her, so at one point she looked like she was covered in plaid!

As she is technically a preemie, they made us stay the full 12 hours. I celebrated with a breakfast of an egg and cheese bagel (I was starving) and then we tried to figure out how to call Air New Zealand to have them page the happy daddy on the flight. (No success!) So he wasn't the last to know, but he wasn't first. He landed around 11 AM our time, and got all of my texts in a flood - he sent me a text that S was great on the flight, and then realized he had a daughter. His response, "Holy Crap!" (Poetic, huh?)

But all things happen for a reason, and this allows me to have two weeks of bonding with the baby before we introduce the rest of the family. Everyone gets their special time.

So we are happy and healthy, and that's what matters.

Holidays in NZ- Sun and Ice Cream

So A and the kids are down under, where it's warm and sunny! Looks like they are having fun - this is now one of my favorite photos - looks like both toddlers and teenagers enjoy Kapiti ice cream, huh? A tells me that she didn't even get that much on her (notice how her brother is holding her chocolate colored sweatshirt, to better ensure that she looks as messy as possible?)

And below are photos of the petting zoo at Lindale (home of the Kapiti ice cream shop) Shopping Center. Appears my daughter is not afraid of hairy pigs or brown sheep. Nana Mayhew (Brenda) is helping out - and by the sound of it when we skype, is being ordered around by my shy, retiring daughter. I keep hearing "Nana, come here!" or "Where's Grandad?" whenever I call them. I miss being there, but it sounds like just what the doctor ordered for the boys - a break from cold, dark Kyiv.

Trapped in the Snow

So, for those following our crazy adventure, I am in Philly, while the rest of the family is down under, in Wellington with the in-laws. As we Skype, I see the kids and A in the background in shorts and tshirts. We, on the other hand, are in the middle of possibly the biggest snowstorm since 1909. They expect between 15 and 20 inches, and here at 11 AM we're only up to about 4...

We had planned a birthday dinner tonight for the Poobah, but we don't want Voo traveling, especially since someone from her bank quit last night and she's now on all day. Our other guest, Aunt Anita, would need to be picked up and dropped off, and no one relishes the thought of being in the height of the storm in the dark, just so we can enjoy tenderloin tips! So we are rescheduling for a more convenient date. The Poobah's birthday was yesterday anyway, and he got a "shout out" at the Christmas concert at the Verizon Center, where the Phildelphia Boys choir and the St. Thomas Episcopal choirs were performing with the Philly Pops. They celebrated the birthday of one of the Pops members, and played Happy Birthday, and asked if anyone else had a birthday. Since Poobah was there with his office, the Bishop made him stand up. He told it like he was embarrassed, but I know that he thought it was really quite cool!

So today we are home, and I am organizing the pantry - must be a leftover nesting instinct, combined with the extra hunger of nursing a baby. Perhaps I will also tackle other parts of the house? Who knows what the day holds? Well, other than Dad shoveling, and a promise to watch the new Harry Potter DVD later.

Boys Take a Weekend

A & M headed to Istanbul last month for a weekend get-away. We had bid on, and won, a two night stay in the Radisson in Istanbul, but it was only one room. We are too big a family to crush into one little area, so I thought this would be a memorable 15th birthday present. (Although I probably won't really know if it was appreciated until our dear son is around 30...) We should have all gone, since A got himself upgraded to a suite. Such is his luck! As you can see, the weather was beautiful, it was full of culture, and just as I remember it. I love Istanbul, and we'll have to go back once we're able to be mobile again - post-baby.
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Point to the goodies!!

Halloween trick-or-treating was on Friday night at my office, since they don't celebrate the holiday here. It was inside, warm and safe. What's not to love? M even came and kindly held his sister's goodybag. Lest you think this was self-serving, the fact is both brother and dad were "guiding" S towards their favorite candies. This was her first time out of the house in 7 days, since we've been battling some yuckiness - a fever the first day and then lots of runny nose and misery. Nothing, apparently, that antibiotics can't fix! And no, it's not swine flu. Or even pumpkin virus....

Dancing pumpkins. Not smiley, just dancing.

Our summer nightmare in Kachanivka

I never posted this when we went, since our camera was in the States having one of its buttons repaired. We used M's camera, and forgot to upload the photos.

At the end of July, we decided to try a Saturday day trip out of town. Our friend recommended a lovely place called Kachanivka - steeped in history, a little like Mt. Vernon in that it is an estate with nice grounds and a park to picnic in. It isn't marked on any map, but she told us that once we got close, we could ask.

Great - loaded up S and took off. A got to try out the new GPS, which is hard when there is no street address, or even a historial site listing. We input the closest town we could find on the map, and drove off. Everything was fine onthe first highway, and then the GPS sent us off on what ostensibly was the most direct path (the longest leg of the triangle) but the GPS does not assess road quality. The going was slow and after about 20 minutes of bumping along, I told my dear husband to turn around and stay on the main highway, even though it was technically longer. It paid off, and we saw a sign eventually that said there was a Kachanivka historical site - just turn left. Which we did. After stopping for directions twice, and grabbing some grub, and grousing between spouses, we did manage to find the beautiful site. It took almost 3 hours to get there, which was not anticipated. (Photos below of the walk down from the main house to the water.) The weather was beautiful.

The return trip was a nightmare of an empty gas tank (bad planning by both me and husband) and a GPS that couldn't figure out how to get us to the closest gas station. This wasn't wholly the GPS' fault, as we were in a tiny dirt-road village, and it kept telling us to turn right in 50 meters, which would have been someone's house. We had to resort to the original plan, which involves me asking the locals for directions, which we did after driving past the same two kids playing soccer in the middle of the road three times. As near as I can tell, the GPS was somehow off in its satellite line-up by around half a kilometer. The return drive kept us on our marital toes, as we tersely debated the merits of electronic guidance versus wifely map-reading. Suffice it to say we alternated and the end result was around 45 minutes down a "road" that was strewn with giant potholes (I am so glad that we brought an SUV) that reminded me of the quality driving experiences in Georgia. For the record, when I told us to turn and follow what looked most logical (i.e. the thickest line on the map) we made good time. When I listened to the evil GPS woman who was programmed to have an Australian accent, we lost time. I still love my husband.
What a day. But now you understand why, if you come to visit, you ain't gettin' a visit to Kachanivka as part of the package!

All About Miss S - the Terrific Twos

In addition to a recent family wedding, we had two big birthdays. S turned 2 and M turned 15. Both got equal amounts of cupcakes, although the younger was definitely more excited about it - she chose "love heart" shaped cupcakes and wanted green frosting. BUT - before the Kyiv party, we had a small ice cream cake in Philadelphia. As evidence from the first photo - she knew what was coming! And then we headed home to Kyiv - S wanted to save us some money and go in the suitcse, but riding on top is definitely more fun. I think this particular humorous look was derived from my dismay at how to get this 50 pound suitcase down the stairs, with a 30 pound toddler on top.

And now a series from S's small birthday dinner in Ukraine. The big party isn't until the 18th of October, since it will take me that long to figure out how to make freakin' Dora cupcakes! She figured out how to blow out the candles really well, and BOY did she get cupcakes. The last photo is courtesy Cousin Caden, who taught her how to make silly faces. Thanks, Caden...

The Voo Gets Hitched

The first picture has nothing to do with Auntie Voo's wedding, but I think it's pretty funny. We were walking back through our parking garage and S wiped out, face-down. And this is how dirty the floor was. She's smiling here, but this was after the shock and hysteria that only a toddler can employ. It's a bit like having the stock market incarnate living with you - ups and down in the space of minutes, with no guarantee you'll end up better off. But she really has settled now that she's had a birthday - sleeping in a big bed, happy with her routine, and talking ALL THE TIME. And in both languages - her Russian accent isn't too bad, but there's an element of baby talk in both languages. Auntie Voo's and Uncle Ben's rehearsal. Not that we needed to rehearse, we were all fantastic. Ledlie is an old pro, and talked us through everything, even the idiosyncracies of St. Peter's Church, which is worth looking up if you are interested, as it is beautifull and historic and very important in my mother's family. I like this photo as Voo is giving a quintessentially Voo look, and Ben appears to be having his moment of omigod that happens before everyone's wedding. Thankfully it didn't last long, as I have not seen two people more ready to get married than these two. Perhaps that's the effect of planning for an entire year. In our wedding, with the acelerated timeline and the pressure of immigration, there was a bit more soul-searching the night before, but we ended up together anyway!! Yeah, best Matron of Honor ever! The Maid of Honor wasn't there yet, due to arriving slightly late to find that all of the gates of the church had been locked and she couldn't get in. What's a wedding without drama? The Poobah and GranDora are looking good.

We don't have wedding photos since I was in the wedding party, and A was doing the videography, but I'm sure once the official photos are up, we'll start collecting pics.

The VP, A Big Bed and Chornobyl

Vice President Joe Biden visited us here in Kyiv, largely to reassure the Ukrainians that a "reset" button with Russia was not a threat to our position of support for an independent Ukraine. He also delivered some tough messages on the need for the Ukrainian politicians to work on unity politically and economically, but the key point was really the "reassure" button.

He held an Embassy meet-and-greet on July 21st, the day after A and I returned from Iceland. So we were very, very close, but we couldn't go up and shake hands due to the 100+ screaming, groupie-like Peace Corps volunteers. I was fearfull of being pummelled in the stomach. But I got a photo, and for most of the speech, the VP was holding S's good friend and fellow 2-year old Keenan. I'm sure if he'd picked up our daughter (who we didn't bring) she would have squirmed, but Keenan was awestruck by the crowd - apparently he's also been held by President Bush, so I guess he's destined to go far. S is going to have to pave her own path.....

Speaking of our charming daughter, here is a photo of her enjoying her transition to a BIG GIRL bed. She is telling us here that this is her pillow and her blanket. It's taken some doing, largely assisted by our trip back to the States where, well, there just wasn't a crib. Some nights and even in the morning, I will still find a roaming toddler, which I'm not used to, but for the most part she's great about it. Next stop, potty-training. And to wrap up July, Aaron went to Chornobyl (yes, that is the correct Ukrainian spelling - Chornyi means black) on the 30th of July with a visitor I had from Washington. I, for obvious reasons, did not attend.
Aaron tells me that the normal Geiger counter reading is low - around 10. Here's you'll see, on the outskirts of the area, that it's reading about 100. Oh, and he went back this week, so I hope we've had all of the children that we're planning on, since lord knows what all of these visits over 3 years will add up to!

Sleepy

S is suffering from jet lag after our return from a great trip to the States, and it isn't pretty. She woke up around 12:45 last night screaming and it took us almost an hour to calm her down. A had the brilliant idea of giving her crackers, since she hadn't wanted dinner. Why does food always work? So, she's had crackers, and wants to go to bed, right? Wrong. She proceeded to want to play for another few hours, run around and pretend it was mid-afternoon. Not helped by the fact that her brother was also up at 2 AM. I was not happy. So. I finally got her to wind down around 4:30 AM, using some fairly brutal tactics, including turning out the light, and pretending to sleep. (Note - it is very hard to only pretend to sleep when you are exhausted and lying down on a comfy pillow.) She dozed off. I, however, had to miss about 3 hours of work so that I could get enough sleep to be functional. The sleep is really for the baby, since I can't drink lots of coffee. As I slept I heard S laughing with the nanny as they headed out to the park at 10 AM. Grumble, grumble. Must be nice being a toddler...

Iceland!!!

(Photo of Gulfoss Falls)

An unexpected romantic destination - we took our honeymoon last weekend in Reykjavik. Due to a roundabout set of circumstances we ended up with a two night stay at the Radisson in Iceland. In order to take full advantage of the trip, we thought we would go while M is in the U.S. in Minnesota, and we left S with the nanny. It was like the honeymoon that we never took right after we were married.

It was a lot of travelling - we had to go through Copenhagen and spent a wonderful 5 hour layover in the airport (tips available on what to do there - I recommend the spa service with facials and massage.) And for some strange reasons, in both directions Iceland Air tried to seat A and I in different rows.

(Photo of the special breed of Icelandic horses - not ponies, full-grown horses.)

A brief summary - Iceland is amazing, incredibly accessible - not geographically but culturally, physically and linguistically, and really relaxing. I'm just going to post a couple of photos here, since my toddler helper keeps trying to push the keyboard keys. The first day we did a full-day tour of the Pinvelligir (the site of the oldest Parliament in the world) the Gulfoss Falls - photo here, and the Geysir (which apparently no longer erupts, so they have a substitute geyser.) That night A and I enjoyed a four-course tasting menu of things Iceland is famous for, including local lobster, which was abaolutely phenomenal and almost made me cry, and lamb. Dinner took almost two hours and we had a real conversation, and there was no reason to hurry. It was the highlight of the trip! On Sunday we did a whale-watching tour, and saw minke whales and dolphins. The sea was remarkably calm, so I didn't feel queasy. (There is a direct correlation between getting motion sickness and morning sickness, and I have been blessed with both in life.)

(Photo of me in front of the natural geothermal energy. The start of our tour was to the geothermal plant - they're so environmental!)

Why children should listen to their parents

While at the charming restaurant described in the last post, we enjoyed our meal in a small outdoor hut. S ran around and played with the flowers and the fountains and, unfortunately for me, a large thick stick.

It was about 4 inches in diameter and about 5 feet tall - so a real piece of hardware. Dad took it away from her once, but it was attractive, so she snuck off and got it again. I went over to tell her it was dangerous and, well, as you can see from the photo, she proved that it was. She refused to let go and in the tussle it bonked me right above the eyebrow. It hurt - but not as much as you would thinbk by the attached photo. It was quite embarassing at work as folks thought perhaps there was marital discord but no, it really was the toddler, I swear!In fact, it's now been about 12 days and the bruise is still on my eyelid, part of the "settling" process, according to our nurse here at Post. Lovely, eh?

Horses and Coffee

We took S on her first horse ride about two weeks ago. She had a look of serious concentration and concern on her face the whole time, but seemed pleased in general. It was at a restaurant that had a petting zoo, including pigs and chickens and full-size horses. Notice, though, the complete absence of safety equipment in this process.

Up top you'll see the restaurant - they like to do outdoor huts where you can eat. Aaron liked this place because a woman in traditional Ukrainian dress greets you at the door and gives you a shot of vodka, one of a lightly-alcoholic fruit juice, and then a piece of, well, basically fat, to wash it down. I begged off, but he took it on - what a champ!

And above, S enjoys a latte with Dad. Shortly after this she accidentally hit me in the eyebrow with a giant stick, leading to the biggest, blackest eye I have had since I was about 7. Thanks, dear!

ROAD TRIP!

Here's a pre-road-trip photo of M handing out the 1st place ribbons to his relay team - he was the anchor and did a fabulous job. He independently won a second and third in two other events. It's a combined middle school/ high school team, and they were competing against local schools and other international schools in Eastern Europe. M's school won overall. Go, team!
We finally got our acts together and planned a trip over a long weekend in the car. We've been trying for a while, but illnesses, S's busy birthday party schedule and inertia seemed to conspire to get us down. Finally, though, we took June 6-8 to head to Lviv (Lvov in Russian) in Western Ukraine. I highly encourage googling it and looking for pictures of the architecture. I was a bit afraid of taking on a big trip - the language barrier, the quality of the roads, the poor quality of the drivers - lots of things that if they went wrong would be incredibly stressful to address. But I faced my fear head on and we hit the road Saturday morning (we're not allowed on roads outside of Kyiv after dark - not a huge problem now since the sun comes up at 4:30 AM and sets at 9:30 PM.) We took my friend Jody with us, so it was a bit crowded in the car - unless you were a toddler in your throne. For a first trip it was great. You follow one road the whole way and don't turn - for 6 straight hours.
We did have to stop for gas - see the photo below where S and I are demonstrating the high-tech firefighting equipment at the gas station!
We rented an apartment in town - a bit of an adventure trying to find it, but so much better than a hotel room. We're just too big a group to fit comfortably in one hotel room, so I am a total apartment-renter convert. Our own kitchen... not having the kids sleep in our room... and all that for less than $60 a night! And the nice landlord didn't even charge us for the drapes that A ruined by pulling out of the wall. (Long story, but they didn't close and as you see above, when the sun comes up at 4:30 it's hard to stay asleep.)
The weather was great, and first thing we did on Sunday (Pentecost or Holy Trinity Day in Ukraine - hence the 3 day weekend) was to climb to the top of Castle Hill. Here are the kids at the top, tickling each other.I have lots and lots of photos of the beautiful architechture, the restaurants, the horses, the trolleys, but here is just an example. It is just like being in Eastern Europe, but like nothing I've ever seen in the former Soviet Union. St. Petersburg is similar, but the history in Lviv is so fascinating and so obvious in the city. Lviv was Polish for centuries and also part of the Austro-Hungarian Empire. It's Soviet/Russian period is fairly short, and that is very evident in how people would generally speak to me in Ukrainian only. I think it was largely a question of being accustomed to it, not a political statement against the Russian language, although politicians here would have you believe it's the cause of some great rift.
So, I stayed in Lviv for work for the week, and the family headed home on Monday, which is right around the time that I realized that M didn't actually have Monday off, only A and I from work. Oops. Another point in the bad paretn book - if he doesn't get into college, it's all my fault!